Ramblings of a Model, Mother and Outspoken Weirdo

...equivalent to 'Bah-Humbug' would be? 'Bah-token heart shaped box of chocs' doesn't quite have the same ring to it. Anyway the point I am trying to make is that Valentines Day doesn't feature for us anymore, when you have been together for 9 years it doesn't, hell we don't do anything for our wedding anniversary either, not because I am not sentimental but because the Mr isn't. I remember once when we rented a house from his ex's presents I found loads of love letters that he had wrote his ex and it proper peed me off. I asked how come you never did that for me, he answered 'I don't need to do that for you'. Thanks man.

Anyway imaginary scenario, I'm not married to Mr Le Beau, I am in a new relationship with super sensitive and romantic Mr Bailey Roth, we have been dating for a month or so and it's amazing. All that hot romance and stuff is there, he makes the effort, he's the perfect gent. He is taking me out on Valentines day and then we're going to walk along the beach barefoot and it's going to be at least 30^oC.

The main question is! What the hell would I wear for this? Mr Le Beau says I don't suit red but I like red, so I am going to wear red goddamn it!

I have been eyeing it up for ages so I'd probably get myself the delicious Bettie Page Peek-a-boo dress from amazing store and eye candy heaven Pin up Parade


I am getting a pair of Rocket Originals for my birthday but for this frock I'd go for the Georgia Red/Cream ones and I'd seek out some gorgeous Rose themed hair item!

Ah well a girl is allowed to dream.......

Ok, I know it's childish and high schooly! I had a pretty good naughty dream last night so this is going to ease my inner heightened sexual desire. For those who don't know what Freebie 5 is, its 5 celebrities I am allowed to sleep with and my husband isn't allowed to get mad.

I have a notoriously bad taste in men! We are not talking like David Beckham and Sting, we are talking Shaun Ryder, Steve Buscemi bad. I came up with the theory that because I prefer scary looking or creepy/geeky guys I am more evolved because I go for guys that other women don't tend to go for, therefore less competition, therefore more chance to reproduce.

So here is my Freebie 5! In no particular order.

This is neither about modelling nor motherhood to be honest, but is a big big decision for me. It will involve a lot of personal inconvenience and discomfort for myself for something that might not even work, it might not result in a child for anyone
I have just filled out the forms and stuff but will have to wait until Violet, my 2yr 7month old to decide she no longer needs breastfed! I should probably be embarrassed really, but knowing that I'm not having any more babies wants me to preserve their baby ways for as long as possible. She only feeds at night now anyway.

The kids were well worth all the stress we had to get them and all the work they have been since they have arrived. I was never a family orientated person until I had them. My family dumped on me way too many times, I was just a bargaining tool used for money or an inconvenience when both my parents were busy. I adore and love every bone in my kids' bodies. All I want is to do a better job than my parents did.

Went to my sisters wedding today! In the lovely Seahouses (I quite enjoy the puffin on the Seahouses website). The weather was gorgeous, my poor mother was so unbelievably stressed, I could just tell she wasn't enjoying it as much as she should have done. Even with the stress my Mam still looked about 15 years younger than she is!

My sister looked beautiful, and the groom and his team looked super dapper in their brown and gold suits, and my niece Charlie looked so cute I could just about eat her up!!

My two were shattered most of the day so we didn't really stay very long. I am not generally a fan of wedding but today was very short and sweet. If we didn't have the kids with us we probably would have stayed longer and mingled more.

I wore a gorgeous purple dress which I bought from the amazing delightful MissMatilda! :)
I had several people say how amazing the dress was.

.

Me and my hubby celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary. We didn't do anything, we have just been together and had kids too long for that. I am pretty sure not many people thought we would stay together as long when we got married 5 months after I turned 16. It probably looked a bit suss that we got engaged a year after I overdosed. People probably just thought I was filling a hole in my life or something. Which might have been the case slightly but there is obviously more to it, me and Ian have had a very uppy and downy relationship, there has been times when it would have been easier to walk away.

I totally understand why there are so many divorces, peoples attitudes to most things in modern society is if things get hard just to give up because they 'can't be bothered, I don't care that I'm unemployed I'll just buy this £3,000 TV from Bright House at an interest rate of a gazillion % and deal with the consquences later'. People don't respect money anymore, and also I don't think love, relationships and definately marriage holds much value anymore.

On a completely different note the kids have started watching crazy crazy TV. Yo Gabba Gabba is totally insane but I love watching it. :)

Haven't got any pics to share with you yet, sure it won't be long.

Just thought I'd do a quite blogette haven't done one in a while, the children have been terribly ill for the last week, been conjuctivitis, ear infection and a flu type but luckily not swine flu. I have been lucky not to catch any of them but I have to admit I am pretty tired from looking after them and it does emotionally drain you.

My Nana is feeling particularly down too, the chemo has taken a lot out of her but she is also feeling lonely because none of us have been able to visit because we have all been so ill but also she has been too shakey and ill to get out herself. That was the last chemo she can have for the foreseeable furture she is now on a trial drug but it may just be a placebo. She just feels really scared and vulnerable.

On a more happy note, my and my hubby were featured here!
http://www.lip-service.com/webzine/?cat=168
So funny! The top he is wearing he bought for me to turn into a crazy zombie DIY dress but haven't got round to it yet.

We got our new sofa! It's cute and comfy we are still waiting for the chair though, there is still a bit of a seating shortage when we have people round.

Getting my Tim Roth tattoo, I have decided, got a gorgeous lovely man called Matt Gould to draw it up for me, it isn't exactly the same as Tim's but very similar but I kinda prefer it and I am getting it on both shoulders. I am going to do a shoot hopefully with some friend peeps (wink wink hint hint) doing at his funky poses, although it occured to me I don't actually know how to hold a fag (or cigarette).

Enough of this boredom stimulator! One random pic from a random SD card.

Copying the idea from the gorgeous MissMatilda, a list of 6 things that make me happy. Will be hard to trim it down but here goes....

There have been some pretty bleak times in my life without bore-casting it to the universe, I like to talk about the fab and joyous things.

1. Naturally, 1st and most importantly. My children. Since the day they arrived they are the most beautiful and perfect things I have ever had the pleasure of being involved with.


2. My husband and my marriage, corny but I love the bummer. Ever since I met him 8 years ago it was love at first sight and it grows stronger every day.



3. My Friends - Ellen and Nick. We have had a longsome relationship, especially me and Ellen, we have sort of turned into adults together, we have been a foursome since the beginning of adulthood. Not so much for Bonza. I love them both squillions, as family even.

4. My Cats - Scout and Lotus - My little brown and black balls of fluff. They are so happy healthy and make me smile on a daily basis. I have already posted a pic of them on a previous blog so I won't bore you with their furry faces again.

5. There are some women who are an inspiration to me, I don't know them on any real personal level but what they do and their success makes me happy. ( I havent worked out tags or anything)

MissMatilda -
http://missmatildadreams.blogspot.com
She is so beautiful and lovely to speak to, and she is fulfilling one of her ambitions through her website www.ablegrable.com
Making beautiful things and making herself happy and bringing joy to others!

Fleur De Guerre
http://www.fleurdeguerre.com/
A truly amazing model and someone with such amazing style and she is so modest!

Helen Highwater
Another stunning lady who brings me much joy through her website
http://www.pinup-parade.com/
She is down to earth and funny and I love reading her posts on various forums.

6. My (sort of) healthy obession with Tim Roth!

It's been almost 7 years since I wore it and married my big doofus of a husband and it fit, it was a bit of a squeeze but it was on my wedding day. I expected putting it on to envoke a big rush of super memories but it just didnt in the end! My children were wrestling on the train of it while I was try it on so maybe part of me was just thinking 'Oh my god! This started....this'!

I have been crazy busy but havent really had a lot on, its been a bit bizarre.

Just watching some Lie to Me and then I am going to finish my Ben Elton book, Blind Faith, its really good and I think I will be able to finish it tonight :D

Ooh another longish day today, Ian was spewing his guts out last night, I could hear it all the loud nasty wretching reminded me of my morning sickness days, I suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum when pregnant with Laurence, it was bad bad bad! I was sick about 6 times every single day but I was always still so hungry! My craving with Laurence was passionfruit too, I ate about 8 each day so my spew looking a little bit like frog spawn.

I have been feeling a bit bloated lately, I think it might just lady month things. I bought a lovely dress from Dorothy Perkins I have been eyeing it up for a while and I was in this morning when I was down the street with Vee and it was in the bloomin' sale!
It's this one
Personally I think it looks nicer on a curvy lass such as myself!

Lie to Me was flipping awesome last night, brooding Roth making me lady tingle. Got my autographed pic this morning from Captain postman.

Ack!

Been a very long day today, had Laurence at the Dr's and she has given him an inhaler because she agree that it might be asthma. He has had a funny day of acting tired, not eating and smacking a kid in the face with his book bag at school. Although to be fair the other kid started it by pushing him. I'm sort of glad to know that he won't just stand and take it and will defend himself when provoked.

I am glad my Mum has an interview, she got made redundant from her job 3 weeks ago and she hates being a dole walla! It's only a job as a school cleaner but she says she doesn't want to work full time again so the hours would suit her perfectly. She did bring some sausages and burgers from the farm so I am looking forward to munching on them with my homies on Saturday night.

Been a tough day with the husband, to be fair though, we always have a bit of a moody time when he is on his holidays. We have a bizarre old relationship. He was out last night until midnight, and he is going out again on Saturday night, despite him telling me a few weeks ago, he definately wanted to be home for Father's Day and do stuff as a family. Tonight after I had got my daughter Violet to sleep twice, and she woke up again he expected me to get her asleep for the third time despite the fact I hadn't even eating dinner.


Lie to Me in 1hr 12mins! Whoo hoo sexy uber Roth!

Check out my stoopid crazy cats! Lotus and Scout