Who Am I?

04:07 Posted In , , , , Edit This 2 Comments »
Been having a bit of an identity crisis lately, been killing my hair, putting holes in my face, getting ink. Since my boyfriend left, I've been a big depressed lump, I've lost a bit of weight my face has changed. I don't like who I am and don't see any worth in anything I do anymore. I had to stop doing my OU degree because I just can't concentrate on anything the way I used to. My brain is utterly fried by 2010/2011.

I think another reason I have been changing my appearance so much it give people something else something else to ask about apart from my relationship, because essentially nothing has changed for 7 months, I was miserable in August and I am still miserable now. Friends tend to dislike when friends are sad and the easiest solution would be to end it. Question is, Is loving someone enough reason to put myself through this? Well apparently it is. I have other various influences that are currently putting more weight on me at the moment. Sort of lost the ability to cope and even the things that were good, are less good now.

Here are the three me's of the last few months.

Just ready for some good luck now, fed up of crying everyday, fed up of not liking myself and tired from not sleeping on eating. I'm running out of hope and all the stuff I had planned for my future just doesn't seem achievable at the moment. I don't want sympathy, this is my mess and I have to trust there is some kind of light at the end of the tunnel.

Still have performances and shoots to blog. been so rubbish, but I like to document stuff I do so I can look back on in and remember which order stuff happened in.

Images taken by
Nicholas Gray
Richard Shepherd
Jonathan Keys


Miss Matilda said...

Yeah your face does look different, but still beautiful xxx

Sarah said...

Have you heard of a photographer called Cindy Sherman? her self portrait images 'film stills' resonate with these, there is some great debate about feminism and stuff too - worth checking out. Remember, you won't feel like this forever x